


These Things We've Seen

by wordsinbetween



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-01
Updated: 2018-05-01
Packaged: 2019-04-30 20:55:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14505300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wordsinbetween/pseuds/wordsinbetween
Summary: In some weirdly fortunate way, all the horrors they’ve faced have been real. She’s real. She’s here, standing right in front of him, and he has no idea where to start.





	These Things We've Seen

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: “Lie to me then.” Post-ep for 5.12 The Real Deal.

After it’s all said and done, after he and the real Mike Peterson close the rift and the remnants of SHIELD have found their way home, he finds her waiting for him in his room. He’s exhausted. His earlier inability to catch his breath is nothing compared to the pounding of his heart when he came face-to-face with his worst fears. _It’s a magical place._

But it’s real. He’s real. In some weirdly fortunate way, all the horrors they’ve faced have been real.

She’s real.

She’s here, standing right in front of him, and he has no idea where to start.

“May—” he starts, throat tight and dry. He’s tired of talking; of not talking.

“I thought we didn’t have secrets,” she says, but he can tell she’s starting to break. Hairline fractures. The longer he stays silent, the faster they stitch together, inching closer to creating something irreparable.

“I wanted to.”

It’s not enough. She turns away, leaning against the desk shoved in the corner of the room. She’s standing as far from him as possible.

“I wanted to tell you the moment I made the deal,” he says, slowly moving toward her until he can touch the desk’s corner. “There was so much I wanted to tell you that night, May.”

She meets his eyes again. He tries to smile. She doesn’t.

“Why lie to me then?” May says, not quite yelling, but with force that he can feel in his aching chest. “Why did you keep lying? I don’t want to hear excuses, Phil. You should have told us. You should have told _me_.”

“I know I made a mistake, but it’s not like there were many opportune moments with the Blue Man Group watching our every move. I’m sorry, May. I don’t even know if Daisy will ever forgive me.”

“You haven’t given me any reason to forgive you, either. I can’t say I blame her,” she says, watching his hand settle close to hers, palm up. Inviting.

“I know, and I deserve that.” He leans his hip against the desk.

He’s so tired of this, always edging closer but never getting anywhere. He’s tired of making mistakes.

“I’m sorry,” he says again, and moves his hand until his fingers wrap around her wrist. His thumb rests on the back of her hand; her skin is warm beneath his touch. She is real. He is real.

She doesn’t shy away. It would be easy for her to turn away and avoid him, but she doesn’t. His breath does not catch; this is the easiest he’s breathed in years.

She lifts her other hand to the back of his neck, pulling him forward until his head is tucked between her neck and shoulder. His eyes shut, heavy from the day and his burden. He sighs deeply as her fingers find their way to the hair at the base of his neck, scratching softly.

“I won’t give up on you,” she says, so softly that it almost masks the waver in her voice. He wraps his other arm around her, pulling them closer together. He knows he doesn’t need to say anything. He will stay there, leaning into her, letting her hold him, for as long as he can.  


End file.
